There’s an old Twilight Zone episode that goes a little something like this.

A scientist constructs the perfect baseball player. He is so unhittable that not a single opponent can reach base against him. When other teams in the league find out that he’s actually a machine and not a man, they contest the rule book and the demand the doctor install a heart. Once ‘human,’ the pitcher can never strike out another batter because, with a heart, he feels sympathy.

The greatest NBA Champions have all had heart but they have also had another key overriding factor: killer instinct. Every time Larry Bird took the floor, he wanted to destroy his opponent’s will. Same with Magic Johnson. Magic may have killed you with kindness but that smile was just a cover. He wanted to rip your heart out.

The same can be said for all NBA champions. Isiah Thomas would stop at nothing to win. Michael Jordan might be the most competitive man to walk the planet. Kobe Bryant would not rest until he led his Lakers to a championship without his former sidekick, Shaquille O’Neal. Tim Duncan might look like a nice guy but don’t kid yourself. Even Dwyane Wade willed himself to an NBA Championship early in his career.

That’s what it takes in the Association. It’s cutthroat. Man’s game. The will to win at all costs. After seven years in the league, however, fans are dying to know: Does LeBron James have what it takes?

The sport hasn’t really seen anything like LeBron. The body of a forward combined with the skill of a guard make him nearly impossible to stop anytime he touches the ball. He is a freak of nature. The problem is he’s also a really nice guy. He’s always joking, smiling, clowning around.

As insane as it sounds when talking about a guy who’s averaging 30 points, 7 rebounds and 8 assists a game, James probably hasn’t even reached his full potential.

He’s too good a player to imagine ending his career without winning a championship, isn’t he? It just wouldn’t seem fair. But if LeBron doesn’t win it all this year, his final contract year in Cleveland, the entire city will stand by with bated breath to see if he’ll re-sign or take his show elsewhere. Cleveland fans are already on the edge of their seats and not because he’s pouring in thirty a night. It’s amazing they can get a good night’s sleep, anxiously awaiting an impending break up.

We’ve heard all the speculation: LeBron to the Knicks; LeBron to the Nets, LeBron to play with his friend Dwyane Wade. As difficult as it is to put all that on the back burner, there’s still a season to be played out. While the Cavs may have the best record in the Eastern Conference, they did last year as well and that only resulted in a loss to Orlando. Unfortunately for LeBron, the Magic, Hawks and Celtics aren’t going anywhere and that’s just the Eastern Conference. Winning the East might only mean a potential meeting with Mount Kobe, a Finals that Nike and the networks were craving last year.

If LeBron doesn’t win it all this year, then what, other than soul-searching? I say let’s enjoy the playoffs but how can we knowing that with every loss, LeBron James edges closer to making a decision that will affect the entire league.

With all due respect to Bill Russell, the modern measuring stick for NBA greatness is Michael Jordan’ six Finals appearances and zero losses and LeBron is already behind the 8-ball. We’ve seen it all too often. Hall of Famers like Charles Barkley, Reggie Miller, Dominique Wilkins and Patrick Ewing all carry the moniker, the burden of never winning a title. Fair or not, legacy in the NBA is measured by one thing: ring count.

This June, Bron Bron might want to add a little killer instinct to his repertoire. Whether he stays in Cleveland or not next season, he might just be on the outside of an NBA title once again. Is LeBron simply too nice or in this competitive league, are the cards stacked against him?Is LeBron James to nice for his own good?

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I’ve never tried my hand at modeling… with good reason.I’ll stick to watching Zoolander for my runway walk-offs. But some superstar athletes simply can’t stay out of the limelight.

Proving once again there is no such thing as an NFL offseason, Terrell Owens, the former Cowboys, Eagless, Niners and Bills wide receiver was spotted recently, not in the end zone (as he was only five times this season) but in a New York fashion show.

Seen here, T.O. is once again showing off his abs. He loves him some him. Next question! His headgear this time? Not a football helmet, but rather a wig, purportedly from his grandmother’s collection.

Ladies and gentlemen, I hereby present the multi-talented, never ego-centric, Terrell Owens.

As usual, the winning entry earns peace of mind and honorable mention in the sportschump.net Hall of Fame.

More often than not, the NBA superstar athlete is unable to translate the success he had on the floor onto either the sidelines or front office.There are exceptions to this rule, such as Pat Riley, Bill Russell, KC Jones or Rudy Tomjanovich, but for the most part, top-tier players have had difficulty leading their teams from the bench as easily as they did when they were in uniform. Imagine Coach Jordan condemning a player for not dropping forty a night. It’d be like Mozart asking a pupil to compose the perfect symphony. They simply expect too much.

The best coaches are generally the more cerebral, fringe players, if they ever even played at all. Phil Jackson averaged seven points and four rebounds over his career but he’s the winningest coach of both the Chicago Bulls AND the Los Angeles Lakers. Red Auerbach never played a minute in the league.

One would think the greatest players ever would be able to at least scout talent, yet time and again they’ve proven woefully inadequate when it comes to building a championship franchise.

Five perennial all-stars come to mind, ferocious on the court but inept in the front office. Accordingly, here’s sportschump.net’s list of Five Best (Players) to Worst (GM’s).

5 - Joe Dumars

I know what you’re saying. Joe Dumars built a championship franchise, but this is the NBA and fans want to know what you’ve done for them lately. This year, the Pistons are 23 games out of first place and a shell of their former selves. Joe D is largely to blame.

On the court, Joe Dumars was a silent assassin, a key cog to Detroits’ run of back-to-back championships. On a team loaded with Isiah Thomas, Bill Laimbeer, Dennis Rodman, Mark Aguirre and John Salley, it was Dumars who won the 1989 Finals MVP.

As GM, he helped build another Pistons dynasty, drafting Tayshaun Prince and trading for Ben Wallace, Richard Hamilton and Chauncey Billups. He also hired Larry Brown.

Then came the 2003 NBA Draft and a decision that will haunt Joe Dumars forever. With Dwyane Wade, Carmelo Anthony and Chris Bosh still on the board, Dumars drafted Darko Milicic which rivals Portland’s selection of Sam Bowie over Michael Jordan as the biggest basketball blunder of all time.

After six consecutive Eastern Conference Finals appearances but only one NBA title, Dumars decided to blow up the team. He drafted Jason Maxiell and Rodney Stuckey but Dumars also presided over the failed Allen Iverson experiment. After three full seasons and a .715 winning percentage, Dumars fired Flip Saunders for not being able to deliver another title. He hired Michael Curry, who finished 39-43 and fired him after one year. This year, he hired John Kuester over Avery Johnson. The Pistons are currently fifteen games under .500 and having their worst season in decades.

Dumars will always be a legend in Detroit. But he may be on thin ice if they can’t turn things around quickly.

4 - Isiah Thomas

Recently Isiah Thomas has been recognized more for bashing Magic Johnson and ruining both the Knicks and the CBA but younger fans forget just how dominant he was. There was Michael, Magic and Larry and Isiah Thomas as a not so distant fourth. He was a 12-time all-star. He averaged 20 points and 9 assists per game for his career. Then there was that Finals game where he scored 25 points… IN ONE QUARTER.

Isiah was the leader of the Bad Boys yet as GM, he’s just been bad. Sure, he drafted Damon Stoudamire, Marcus Camby and Tracy McGrady but was unable to build the Raptors into a successful franchise. The Continental Basketball Association went bankrupt under his ownership.

After a brief and relatively successful coaching stint with the Indiana Pacers, Thomas became President of Basketball Operations for the New York Knicks. His teams consistently had the highest payrolls and the worst records, never a good combination. He traded for Michael Curry and Zach Randolph which is about 700 pounds of bad decision-making. He was also sued for sexual harassment.

Isiah now finds himself in an entirely new challenge: coaching college kids at Florida International University. With failed stints in Toronto, Indy and New York, it’s highly unlikely any other NBA franchise will give Thomas a chance to run, or ruin, their franchise.

3 - Michael Jordan

Most basketball fans agree that MJ was the best player to ever grace the hardwood. Unfortunately for his Airness, that excellence has not carried over into the front office. Far from it.

In 2000, MJ took over as President of Basketball Operations for the Washington Wizards. He was fired two-and-a-half years later, probably the first time he had been fired from anything. That was about as long as his baseball career with a similar amount of success.

Jordan was the brain trust behind drafting high schooler Kwame Brown first overall. Brown is currently coming off the bench for Detroit, averaging under four points and four rebounds a game. Jordan would have been better off drafting Sam Bowie. Jordan also drafted Jared Jeffries and Juan Dixon in the 2001 draft. Those two didn’t fare much better.

In 2006, Jordan became partial owner and managing member of basketball operations for the Charlotte Bobcats. In that time, they chose Adam Morrison third in 2006 when Brandon Roy was still on the board. Jordan selected Brandan Wright from his alma mater, then traded him to Golden State for Jason Richardson who turned out to be a bust. This year the Bobcats have finally proven to be worth a damn, currently hovering around .500 in a weak Eastern conference.

It’s tough to come down too hard on MJ since the Bobcats are somewhat decent but prior to this season, they finished 20 games behind Orlando in 2007-8 and 24 games behind them in 2008-9. This year, they’re 7-19 on the road.

We’ll see if the Bobcats can make the playoffs this season or if their current success is just a flash in the pan.

2 - Elgin Baylor

Elgin Baylor was the Minneapolis Lakers’ number one draft pick in 1958. An 11-time all-star, Baylor has tallied 23,149 points and 11,463 rebounds over his career. After a brief coaching stint in New Orleans, he was hired on as the Clippers VP of basketball operations in 1986. That move secured their mediocrity for decades.

While Baylor cannot be held solely responsible for the Clippers’ woes, he certainly pulled the strings. He drafted Danny Manning first in 1988 which was a no-brainer but then drafted Danny Ferry second overall the following year. Ironically, Ferry has turned into a pretty good GM.

In the 1990s, Baylor drafted Loy Vaught, LeRon Ellis, Elmore Spencer, Randy Woods, Terry Dehere, and Lamond Murray. In 1996, he drafted Lorenzen Wright when Kobe Bryant, Steve Nash and Jermaine O’Neal were still available. In 1998, he drafted Michael Olowakandi over Antawn Jamison, Vince Carter, Dirk Nowitzki and Paul Pierce. Feeling nauseous yet? Add drafting Chris Wilcox one spot ahead of Amare Stoudemire in 2002 and that should do the trick.

The Clippers have been the laughing stock of the league. In Baylor’s 22 years, the Clippers have won one playoff series and had only two winning seasons.

In 2009, he filed an employment discrimination lawsuit against the Clippers citing he was fired based on age and race. Had they discriminated against him for his management inadequacies, he might have had a case.

In a two-team town, the Clippers have always played second fiddle to the Lakers but even the New York Mets have won the World Series, probably because Baylor wasn’t making their personnel decisions. Baylor finally won the league’s Executive of the Year award in 2006, meaning it took him 15 years of playing and another 20 in the office to be able to assess talent. I guess some people are just slow learners.

Baylor was fired in 2008 and replaced with Mike Dunleavy meaning the Clippers should still suck for a long time to come.

1 - Kevin McHale

McHale was a beast in the post for the 1980s Celtics. Charles Barkley called McHale the toughest cover in the game. McHale’s teammates dubbed him the Black Hole, knowing he could score any time he got the ball on the low blocks. Little did they know that moniker would also refer to his decision-making as a GM. The only thing worse than Kevin McHale’s taste in sweaters was his taste in draft picks.

Despite his success with the Celtics, McHale will forever be known as the man who could not surround Kevin Garnett with talent. Garnett was ultimately traded to Boston where he won a championship in his first year.

Things got off to a promising start for McHale when he was hired in 1995. He drafted Garnett who would become the face of the franchise. McHale also signed Tom Gugliotta and Stephon Marbury. The only problem was, he drafted Ray Allen and traded him to get Marbury. Whoops! Years later, he would trade Marbury for Terrell Brandon. Ray Allen for Terrell Brandon? You’d get kicked out of your fantasy league for even suggesting such a trade.

McHale would later sign William Avery, Andrae Patterson, Sharone Wright, Felipe Lopez, Gary Trent, Robert Pack, Ricky Davis, Kendall Gill, Rod Strickland… shall I continue? Not only did McHale master surrounding the Big Ticket with small talent, Minnesota was later penalized for illegally signing Joe Smith. Breaking league violations to acquire Joe Smith is like getting caught stealing a Yugo.

Want more bad decisions? McHale drafted Brandon Roy then traded him for Randy Foye. McHale replaced Randy Wittman as the T’Wolves head coach on Dec 8, 2008 and went 20-43 the remainder of the season. He was not invited back. You can now find McHale doing analysis on NBA TV where he’s not destroying franchises.

McHale could score at will for the Celtics but as a GM, he was pretty much held scoreless.

I have a picture of my uncle of me when I was about 15 years old. I’m wearing a Gator shirt in the photograph. My uncle Rosco attended the University of Florida well before me and had given me the shirt as a gift. At that point, campus life in Gainesville was still years away. I was much more focused on more important things in life, like how to properly unsnap a bra.

Twenty-five years later, not much has changed. I’m still wearing Gator shirts and most of my time is spent trying to finagle my way around a bra strap.

Over that same twenty-five years, however, Gainesville has changed in leaps and bounds. A school that had nary a conference championship in either football or basketball now boasts five national and twelve conference championships. They became the first school ever to hold football and basketball titles simultaneously. It was as if championships grew on trees.

But things might never be this good again in Gainesville. How could they possibly? After two championships in four years, they have a football coach who’s health is in question, a golden boy gone and nearly an entire defense drafted. The cupboard isn’t exactly bare but what’s left inside is certainly inexperienced.

For those of you who have never visited Hogtown, football is a religion. It’s no different from any other college town that lives and breathes football like Columbus or Tuscaloosa or Austin… except the weather is considerably better.

Next season, however, marks a new beginning. The winningest senior class in SEC history has bid the Swamp a fond farewell. Gone are Riley Cooper, Jermaine Cunningham, Dustin Doe, David Nelson, Brandon James, Brandon Spikes, Ryan Stamper and of course Tim Tebow. Juniors Joe Haden and Carlos Dunlap have also declared for the draft and are both projected first rounders. Nobody knows what will happen with Urban Meyer, his health a primary concern.

Meyer shocked Gator Nation not long ago when he made his health issues public and abruptly announced his retirement. Offensive Coordinator Steve Addazio was named interim head coach, for a minute, until Urban unretired. He has now vowed to be on the sidelines this spring, but the 2010-11 season might just be his biggest coaching challenge yet.

A short time ago, Billy Donovan won back-to-back national championships in Gainesville. The athletes he recruited, Al Horford, Joakim Noah and Corey Brewer, were recently voted the college basketball team of the decade by ESPN. But Donovan’s recent recruits have yet to win a tournament game. Staying on top is no easy task.

Similarly, between 1993 and 1996, Florida won four consecutive conference and one national championship. but only one after Danny Wuerffel left. Spurrier could never recover from the loss of his Heisman trophy winner and Wuerffel was no Tim Tebow. Hence the challenge that lay in front of Urban Meyer.

Despite reports of a record recruiting class, including landing 17 of ESPN’s top 100 prospects, Tim Tebow was one of the greatest college football players ever. In many ways, he transcended the sport. Don’t believe me? There’s currently more talk about where he’ll be drafted than there is discussion about the consensus number one pick, Ndamukong Suh. Duplicating Tebow’s success won’t be easy. The shadow larger than it’s ever been.

Of course the challenge of starting from scratch pales in comparison to getting Urban’s health right, but both tasks seem monumental. Alabama won a national championship and show no signs of slowing down under head coach Nick Saban. SEC football is not for the weak of heart, no pun intended.

College football chews up coaches and spits them out. With the pressure to win and win now, long tenured coaches like Joe Paterno, Frank Beamer and Bobby Bowden are a thing of the past. Even Bowden was forced out of the stadium that bears his name.

Which brings us back to Urban Meyer.

Amid such stout competition, can he rebuild another national championship essentially from scratch? Can he make household names out of Ronald Powell, Dominique Easley, Matt Elam and Johnathan Dowling as he did with Tebow, Percy Harvin and Brandon Spikes?

If anyone can, it’s probably Meyer. Despite a whirlwind January, Meyer still managed to woo a record recruiting class to Gainesville. While that’s no guarantee of success, it’s a good start. Suddenly things might not be that bad after all. We’ll see what happens when the school takes its first Tebow-less snap.